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Lost in translation....

Teacher: Name 5 animals that live in water.

Student: Frog. Teacher: Very good, 4 others?

Student: Its mother, father, sister and brother.

 

Definition Of A Boss: 

“Boss Is A Person Who Thinks That Nine Women Together Can Produce A Baby In One Month“

Edited by Rajeshl
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An old guy was working out in the gym when he spotted an attractive young lady.


He asked a nearby trainer, "What machine should I use to impress that lady over there?"


The trainer looked him up and down and said, "I would try the ATM in the lobby."

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There Are Three Kinds Of Men In The World. 

Some Remain Single & Make Wonders Happen, 

Some Have Girlfriends & See Wonders Happen, 

The Rest Get Married & Wonder What Happened?

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: Explaining Marketing Concepts : 

This Is How A Professor Explained Marketing Concepts To A Class: 

You See A Gorgeous Girl At A Party.

You Go Up To Her And Say: “I Am Very Rich. Marry Me!”

That’s Direct Marketing.

 

You Are At A Party With A Bunch Of Friends And See A Gorgeous Girl.

One Of Your Friends Goes Upto Her And Pointing At You Says: “He’s Very Rich. Marry Him!”

That’s Advertising.

 

You Are At A Party And See A Gorgeous Girl. She Walks Up To You And Says: “You Are Very Rich! Can I Marry You?”

That’s Brand Recognition. 

 

You See A Gorgeous Girl At A Party. You Go Upto Her And Say: “I Am Very Rich. Marry Me!” She Gives You A Nice Hard Slap On Your Face.

That’s Customer Feedback. 

 

You See A Gorgeous Girl At A Party. You Go Upto Her And Say: “I Am Very Rich. Marry Me!” And She Introduces You To Her Husband.

That’s Demand And Supply Gap. 

 

You See A Gorgeous Girl At A Party. You Go Upto Her And Before You Say: “I M Rich, Marry Me!”, Your Wife Arrives.

That’s Restriction For Entering New Markets.

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A Man Who Is Driving A Car Is Stopped By A Police Officer. 

The Officer: “You Were Going At Least 75 In A 55 Zone” 

Man: “No Sir, I Was Going 60”

Wife: “Oh Johnny, You Were Going 80” 

Officer: “I’m Also Going To Give You A Ticket For Your Broken Tail Light” 

Man: “Broken Tail Light? I Didn’t Know About A Broken Tail Light!” 

Wife: “Oh Johnny, You’ve Known About That Tail Light For Weeks” 

Officer: “I’m Also Going To Give You A Citation For Not Wearing Your Seat Belt”

Man: “Oh, I Just Took It Off When You Were Walking Up To The Car” 

Wife: “Oh, Johnny, You Never Wear Your Seat Belt” 

Man Turns To His Wife And Yells: “Shut Your Damn Mouth Bitch” 

Officer Turns To The Woman And Asks: “Mam, Does Your Husband Talk To You This Way All The Time?” 

Wife: “No, Only When He’s Drunk“

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Ever Heard About The Device That Converts Your Precious Thoughts Into Speech? 

Spoiler

It Is Called “Wine"

 

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